#PartyLikeAHope

Sitting here watching Step Brothers remembering the time that...

Sun, 12 May 2013 20:41:00 -0400

Sitting here watching Step Brothers remembering the time that this happened.

Photo

Wed, 08 May 2013 11:08:33 -0400

tastefullyoffensive: [via]

Wed, 08 May 2013 11:07:02 -0400

tastefullyoffensive:

[via]

My academic career

Mon, 06 May 2013 23:35:45 -0400

thedefenderoftheearth:

2001:

Present:

harfologist: pubicmilk: ironic iconic

Mon, 06 May 2013 09:59:07 -0400

harfologist:

pubicmilk:

ironic

iconic

I am going to walk down the aisle to the guitar solo in John Mayer's Bold As Love.

Mon, 06 May 2013 09:56:42 -0400

Fox and Friends Corrections SNL

Sun, 05 May 2013 10:03:00 -0400

Kentucky Derby losers are not turned into Ikea meatballs.
Dzhokhar Tsarnaev did not accidentally blow up vowels in his own name.
The chupacabra does not deliver presents on Cinco de Mayo.
President Obama does not want to take away T-shirt guns.
Most women have only two breasts.
The Memphis Grizzlies are not a gay blues band.
Scientology was not founded by I Ron Man.
Bangladesh is not an 80s metal band.
Peeking at ladies’ butts is not a background check.
Actual crows do have feet.
Pot pie is legal in every state.
The California wildfires are not a soccer team.
Jason Collins was not turned gay by a Washington Wizard.
The NRA is not a branch of government.
Foreign visas do not let Russian students go on shopping sprees.
Rick Moranis was never put on death row for shrinking his children.
New York exists outside the mind of Billy Joel.
A French press is not lifting weights with your tongue out.
Lena Dunham is not a girl ventriloquist.
Number 2 pencils are not sad that they lost.
Plan B birth control is not masturbating.
Justin Bieber and Anne Frank were not an item.
President Obama did not just wake up in Mexico.
F.A.A. does not stand for “Fart A**, A**”
Croquettes are not female crocodiles.
Kanye West is not an African American vacation destination.
Syria is not Arabic for “serious.”
Rice and beans are edible. Ricin beans are not.
Casual Friday is not in the Bill of Rights.
Sam Adams was not too drunk to sign the Constitution.
The Gitmo prisoners are not working on their bodies.
Force feeding is not how Jedi’s eat.
Kevin Costner does not live in Watertown.
Smurfs are not elected.
Smurfs are not appointed.
Smurfs are cartoons.
Aretha Franklin and Patti Labelle have been in the same room together.
Anytime minutes don’t let you call the future.
4 and 3 are not basically the same thing.
Rock beats scissors.
Zach Braff is not the sound a trumpet makes.

tiny-yeast-farts: id be fuckin dead what the hell do you expect...

Fri, 03 May 2013 19:24:28 -0400

tiny-yeast-farts:

id be fuckin dead what the hell do you expect me to do a fuckin backflip

Photo

Thu, 02 May 2013 22:39:24 -0400

heavyheartthinking: wildflower-pickin-countrygirl: omg!!! HE...

Thu, 02 May 2013 22:38:19 -0400

heavyheartthinking:

wildflower-pickin-countrygirl:

omg!!! HE SMASHES THE STRAWBERRIES ON THE COUCH FOR HER!!!

areyoutryingtodeduceme: jackthevulture: thenameisroxylalonde: ...

Thu, 02 May 2013 10:03:36 -0400

areyoutryingtodeduceme:

jackthevulture:

thenameisroxylalonde:

letmebeyourtlc:

ihavestudyingtodo:

thegrimsleeper:

YO BITCHEZ, LOVE DUNKAROOS?

WANT TO MAKE A MASS QUANTITY OF IT AND SAVE MONEY AT THE SAME TIME??

WELL HERE YOU FUCKING GO:

1 box funfetti cake mix (DO NOT add the ingredients that you usually would to actually make the cake - you need just the mix)
2 cups plain yogurt
1/2 container of cool whip.
Serve with animal crackers or graham crackers.

SIGNAL BOOST THIS. HELP ME FEED MY PEOPLE.

holy fuck

what the flying fuck is a dunkaroo?

hoLY FUCKING SHIT YESSSS

WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU MEAN

“WHAT IS A DUNKAROO”!?

OH MY GOD I AM MAKING THIS ON WEDNESDAY

deejaywhy: omg hahahahhah

Wed, 01 May 2013 13:38:21 -0400

deejaywhy:

omg hahahahhah

gru-ff: you’ve become sodamaged, that whensomeone wants togive you, what youdeserveyou have no...

Tue, 30 Apr 2013 13:40:03 -0400

gru-ff:

you’ve become so
damaged, that when
someone wants to
give you, what you
deserve
you have no idea,
how to respond.

me: time for bed

Mon, 29 Apr 2013 22:36:18 -0400

me: time for bed
stomach: LET'S EAT 15 CHEESEBURGERS WITH ICE CREAM CAKE AND POTATO CHIPS WITH AN ENTIRE TACO BELL ON THE SIDE
brain: HEY REMEMBER ALL THOSE WORRIES, IDEAS, ASPIRATIONS AND OTHER ANXIOUS THOUGHTS WELL NOW YOU DO
muscles: I HURT FOR AN UNEXPLAINED REASON LIKE ARE YOU GROWING DO YOU HAVE A DISEASE LOL IDK HELP
skin: LET'S PLAY A GAME CALLED ARE YOU ITCHY OR DID A SPIDER EGG SACK JUST BIRTH ON YOU
ears: THERE'S A JET PLANE 500 MILES AWAY ALSO I THINK THE NEIGHBOR IS VACUUMING
eyes: WOW EVER NOTICE HOW IF YOU LOOK CLOSELY INTO PITCH BLACKNESS YOU CAN ALMOST SEE YOUR WORST NIGHTMARE
mouth: IT'S DEATH VALLEY UP IN HERE
body: HAVE FUN TOSSING AND TURNING FOR THE NEXT 2 HOURS
me: ok

Photo

Sat, 27 Apr 2013 18:39:52 -0400

My life has meaning now.

Sat, 27 Apr 2013 18:35:46 -0400

My life has meaning now.

nothingbecomingsomething: weightlesslives: Posting on Tumblr is like talking to your cat. You...

Thu, 25 Apr 2013 23:03:42 -0400

nothingbecomingsomething:

weightlesslives:

Posting on Tumblr is like talking to your cat. You don’t know if they are listening, and you don’t know if they care, but for some reason, it still helps.

This might be the most accurate thing I’ve read ever

aka-cats: sh4rki: Hi Sebastian has this phobia i guess you...

Thu, 25 Apr 2013 21:39:56 -0400

aka-cats:

sh4rki:

Hi Sebastian has this phobia i guess you would call it of eating alone, he won’t eat unless someone is in the same room eating as him, i dont know why and we’ve taken him to the vet to see if it’s a stomach problem on why he wasn’t eating until we started to notice a pattern, only when you’re in the room eating will he start to chow down on his food. So we put his bowl on his side of the table and he eats Breakfast, Lunch and Dinner with us. He’ll wait till you’re seated and eating to start on his meal, it’s really sweet, though we still have no idea why he does it.

WHAT THATS THE CUTEST THING EVER OMG

fucking cats, man

ignitionremix: shawty got low low low low low shawty is my bank account balance shawty is my GPA

Thu, 25 Apr 2013 21:38:40 -0400

ignitionremix:

shawty got low low low low low

shawty is my bank account balance

shawty is my GPA

kittens have their first sips of water [x] That’s the...

Thu, 25 Apr 2013 21:37:24 -0400

kittens have their first sips of water [x]

That’s the same face I make when I take my first sip of weekend beer